Lovely Quote About Self-Responsibility

Sep 24th, 2008

30-Day Self-Care Challenge (Part II) Day 24

Tell everyone you know:

‘My happiness depends on me,
so you’re off the hook.’
And then demonstrate it.
Be happy, no matter what they’re doing.
Practice feeling good,
no matter what.
And before you know it,
you will not give anyone else
responsibility for the way you feel
and then, you’ll love them all.
Because the only reason
you don’t love them,
is because you’re using them
as your excuse to not feel good

ABRAHAM-Hicks

Tough Day at the Office?

Sep 23rd, 2008

30-Day Self-Care Challenge (Part II) Day 23

Your boss just doesn’t get you or your program?  You have to justify everything?  Your funding goes out the window?  Your supervisor is half your age?  You can’t find anything because you haven’t had the time to file things in months?  Your cube mate won’t stop talking and you can’t focus?  Your computer network was down half the day?

Stuff happens.  We have bad days–hopefully not every day.  What can you do to take care of yourself?

10 Things to Sooth a Bad Day at the Office 

1. Go to bed earlier than usual.  More sleep is required when times are stressful.Call a friend and talk about it.
2. Walk it off.  A long, brisk walk will help burn the stress products your body produced during the day.
3. Forget it….it’s history!
4. Recognize that tomorrow is a new day and a new day is almost always brighter.
5. Take a hot, soaking bath.
6. Do something fun to help you shift your negative perspective.
7. Just decide to shift your negative perspective, with or without a diversion.
8. Call a friend and talk about it.
9. Close your eyes and take a mini vacation.  Go somewhere in your mind’s eye that is relaxing like the beach, the mountains, the prairie, or the ocean.  Luxuriate in the peacefulness.
10. Capture any possible opportunities.  Did the problems that occurred today make you think of fixes for the future?

What are Your Self-Care Priorities?

Sep 16th, 2008

30-Day Self-Care Challenge (Part II) Day 16

When it comes to self-care, do you need to reorient your thinking–shift your priorities?  How would you organize the following list–with #1 being the most important:

1. Your family
2. Your friends
3. Your Work
4. Politics (it’s heating up isn’t it!)
5. Your health and well-being

Notice that your health and well-being is at the bottom of the list.  I think that’s where it is for most people.  Are YOU most people?

Getting Strong Baby!

Sep 13th, 2008

30-Day Self-Care Challenge (Part II) Day 13

Remember when I whined about not enjoying weight lifting and a subscriber commented that she preferred to call it strength training because she loves the idea of being strong?  Well, that clicked for me. 

When I work out at the gym now I think about getting stronger.  For me it’s happening surprisingly fast!  I have upped my weights  relatively quickly and I’m still not grunting.  My body is taking to getting strong.  That might be because I have a strong personality, a strong sense of wellness, and a strong interest in being well and strong.

I’m not hoisting ridiculous amounts of weight–I don’t want to get injured.  As I lift the weights, I’m paying attention to my body.  When it says “yes this feels good,” I know I’ve got the right weight.  When it says “I can do more,” I increase the weights.

It’s helping having a personal trainer.  Jalon is great–knowledgeable, fun, and an excellent role model–she LOVES lifting weights.  I was hoping it would wear off on me and it is!

Capitalize on Circumstances

Sep 12th, 2008

30-Day Self-Care Challenge (Part II) Day 12

While Hurricane Ike is terrorizing the gulf coast, tornadoes and floods are threatening the Midwest.  Rain, rain, rain.  All day long!  All week long!  Clearly it isn’t going to stop any time soon.

Shortly after waiting out the tornado watches in the basement, Toby and I headed out for a walk carrying my largest umbrella.  He was my impetus.

If I didn’t have a dog, I know I would have sat tight in my warm, dry house.  Fortunately, I have an extremely active dog that demands exercise.  So we headed out for walk along the Kansas River. 

Usually we walk through the river bottom farmland on the flat, wide levee path.  But today when I spotted the bike trail heading into the woods, I thought, bingo!  It might not be as wet and bikes are not allowed to ride in the mud…so the maniacs won’t be crashing through the woods terrorizing us as they take the hills and curves with their wild, youthful zeal.  The bike trail is wonderfully challenging. I dumped myself into the brambles and bushes one day when skidding off the narrow path on my mountain bike.

But today, we’re home free–no bikers! (Sorry guys, I love ya, but I enjoyed not having to dive off the path to safety). 

Toby cut through the woods like a speeding bullet.  If he were a young man, I know he would be crashing through the woods on a mountain bike! 

I enjoyed picking my way along the muddy path straddling the large puddles and splashing through the small ones.  My Crocks were perfect for this kind of thing!

Peering through the thick brush I could see the river flowing high and fast.  I also saw the poison ivy EVERYWHERE!  And I knew I was immune somehow.  This was a magical moment.  Part of the magic was that NO ONE else was seeing what I was seeing or doing what I was doing.  No one!  It was like being the only one in a movie theater with the big screen all to myself…which I did once too. 

It’s pouring down again!  I’ve got my front and back doors open enjoying the storm.  Fortunately the rain is coming straight down so I can keep them open, at least for the time being.  I want the magic to last.

If I had not gone for a walk, today would be just like any other annoying rainy day that kept me from doing what I wanted to do.  But because Toby encouraged me to capitalize on the circumstances, we had an adventure.  He’s still hepped up.  And so am I. 

Tomorrow the street will be lined with cars and sightseers watching the river rise.  Flood warnings bring them out.  It’s big news.

Self-Care includes having adventures…

Overcoming Procrastination

Sep 10th, 2008

30-Day Self-Care Challenge (Part II) Day 10

Much of Lifestyle Change is Overcoming Procrastination

There are many ways to avoid the important things you wish to accomplish in life. Stop smoking, achieving a healthy weight, and doing a better job at managing all those stressors in your life are a few examples. As human beings, many of us are very reluctant to make lifestyle changes. Our habits are something we can count on, and they give us a sense of security and certainty about life. Attempting to break a bad habit or acquire a new one, even if it’s for the better, can make us feel uncomfortable and lead us back to the familiar.

One of the most sure-fire ways to avoid those changes we know we should make is procrastination. Procrastinators consistently sabotage themselves. They constantly put obstacles in their own path.

“Many people don’t realize procrastination is an automatic habit pattern they use to avoid tension,” says William Knaus, Ed.D, a psychologist and author of “The Procrastination Workbook.” “It’s kicked off by some form of discomfort, such as feeling uncertain or insecure about something. These habit patterns are the barriers to overcoming procrastination.”

Diversions from Lifestyle Change

Dr. Knaus divides these patterns into the following three diversions.

• Mental Diversions
  If you think, “I can’t do it right now because I’m too tired. I’m not alert enough. I won’t be able to concentrate well enough. I’ll get to it later when I’m better prepared to think more clearly,” then you’ve fallen into a procrastination trap known as the Manana Diversion (pronounced (mä-nyä’nə) meaning tomorrow or at an unspecified time in the future. You’ve fooled yourself into thinking later is different from now, and that later will be better.
• Action Diversions
  With this barrier, you procrastinate by going to the water cooler, doodling, calling someone on the phone or doing something else on your computer.
• Emotional Diversions
  Many changes you want to make aren’t inspiring or motivating–they’re drudgery. If you wait to be inspired to do something you consider a drag, you’ll be waiting a long time.

Overcoming Diversions

The Five-Minute System
Commit to the change for five minutes. For example, tell yourself, “I’ll work for the next five minutes on gathering the information for making this change.” At the end of that five minutes, decide whether you’ll commit for another five. Continue this pattern until you complete the task, run out of time or have a good reason to stop. “By doing the task for at least five minutes, you’re already living through the frustrations that are a part of the change, and you’re making a series of forward-moving decisions,” says Dr. Knaus.

Plan in Reverse
Many people set goals to make changes in their life, but don’t have a plan. To create a clear, directed and purposeful plan: First, visualize your goal as a target and imagine shooting an arrow into the target’s center. Imagine the arrow’s trajectory as you pull it back, release and hit the center. In other words, visualize your outcome first, then work back from there. Where do you want to end up? What do you do just before that, and before that? By doing this, you’re automatically creating a plan at the same time you’re reminding yourself the plan is a series of small parts.

Building Frustration Tolerance
If you can develop a higher frustration tolerance, you’ll achieve more in life because fewer things will burden your mind. By persistently tackling challenging tasks until you complete them, you build frustration tolerance.
“Even if you don’t overcome the discomfort, you’ve lived through the frustration, which creates this powerful message: You can organize and direct your activities for a productive result, and you do have control over yourself,” says Dr. Knaus. “It’s better to recognize that doing reasonable things, in a reasonable way, within a reasonable time, gets things done–and you end up doing rather than stewing.”

How My Plumber Gets Me to the Gym

Sep 8th, 2008

30-Day Self-Care Challenge (Part II) Day 8

I haven’t had a shower in my own home for a week!  I won’t give you the boring details about why it’s taken this long to get my plumbing fixed…but not being able to take a shower has driven me to the gym on a consistent basis.  And that’s a good thing.  If you have trouble getting to the gym, maybe you could work a deal with your plumber.

Today when he didn’t arrive on time, I called and learned that had an emergency with water pouring through the ceiling of some unfortunate soul’s home.  Maybe I should share my secret with these home owners…of how to get their bodies to the gym

Silly stuff I know.  But can you see that there are layers of self-care fodder here?  I’ve had to be creative in getting my needs met for a shower.  I’ve had to keep my spirits up by finding a workable solution.  And I’ve stayed calm knowing that everything will work out–it always does.

Don't Delay!

Sep 4th, 2008

Self-Care Challenge – Part II (Day 4)

Delay is increasingly expensive.  Take care of yourself today!